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RENO 911: MIAMI

NOTE: This spoiler was actually sent in last summer by "Anonymous" who saw it at an advance screening. Hopefully, not too much has changed since then.

The movie opens with a Detective talking to another Detective about how serious the situation is.  It turns out that there is a nuclear threat on a building and they need the best of the best to take care of the problem.  As they’re talking about who they could get to do the job we see a helicopter landing behind.  Getting out the helicopter is no other than Reno’s finest, the Reno Sheriffs Department.  They all come off the helicopter with they’re tactical suits, guns and ammo (except for Clementine who’s wearing a small bathing suite instead of her suit).  Everyone around them is in aw and we notice that one of the team members is missing; it’s Lt. Jim Dangle (Thomas Lennon).  All of a sudden we hear a motorcycle in the background, we see it’s Lt. Dangle (still wearing his tiny shorts) and he’s jumping over cars and doing flips while on the motorcycle, then he falls off.   Just as the team is about to go into the action…Deputy Junior (Ben Garant) wakes up and realizes it was all a dream.  Lt. Dangle, who’s sitting right next to him, tells him “you know you’re driving right?” and they crash into a construction site.

Back at the station we see that everyone is rushing out of the station because they just got an important call and when they all get to the location they all find that it’s a chicken in the road, someone had typed in the wrong code and they thought it was a person jumping off a roof with a gun (actually no one had a clue what the code was).  They all chase it around for a while, and try to shoot it all at the same time.  It’s a pretty funny scene because it’s just a chicken and no one can get a hold of it.

Cut to the briefing room where Lt. Dangle it updating everyone on what’s going on and he tells them that they have all been invited to this years National Police Convention in Miami.  They’re all excited but confused as to why they got invited because they never get invited and Lt. Dangle explains that it’s because everyone was invited this year.  Dep. Raineesha Williams (Niecy Nash) and Dep. Clementine Johnson (Wendi McLendon-Covey) are talking about flying first class and how exciting it’s going to be when Lt. Dangle bursts their bubble and explains that they’re going to be going first class but firs class on a bus.  We see all of the Sheriffs Dept. on the bus and we see the different seating arrangements.  Dep. S. Jones (Cedric Yarbrough) sitting with Dep. Clementine Johnson and they’re cuddling and Deputy Trudy Wiegel (Kerri Kenney) trying to get close to Lt. Jim Dangle while they sleep. In the next scene we see that Lt. Jim Dangle has switched spots with Dep. Clementine Johnson and now he’s trying to snuggle with Dep. S. Jones while he sleeps (it’s a hilarious scene). 

After like a 35 hour bus trip Miami they get to the convention only to find that their names are not on the list and they cannot get they’re room keys because of it.  They end up staying at some roach motel downtown where there seems to be illegal things happening all the time.  They decide that instead of moping around they should go out and have some fun so they all go out to drink and party.  Back at the motel we see that Junior is trying to get with this Asian girl who’s half naked but he get pepper sprayed and runs, Raineesha is trying to pull the moves on Jones but he’s acting like he’s sick, Raineesha runs into Dep. Kimball (Mary Birdsong) who is saying goodnight to three half naked girls that are leaving her room, Trudy is trying to get with Dangle, and Jones it trying to get with Clementine until Raineesha catches them and they both take off in different directions.  Jones is taking a walk to his room when he looks in the window and he see’s that Junior (his roommate) is pleasing himself, he runs and as he runs he sees in every open window that every one of the deputies is pleasing themselves and he runs off in disgust.  The next morning Clementine, who is very hung over, comes into one of the rooms where Jones and Dangle is sleeping (not together) and shows them a tattoo she got the night before of the man of her dreams.  Clementine had spent the entire night with this man and now all she has is a picture of him on her left breast to remember him by.

After recovering from their hang over the team goes to the convention site to see if their tickets had possibly been found. When they get there they see that the entire building as been blocked off and covered over because it has been contaminated with something deadly due to a terrorist attack.  The only people left outside are the HazMAP people, National Security and a guy who is temporarily Mayor (because the real one is inside of the building).  The head of National Security tells the Reno Sheriffs Department that since they are the only Police officers available they will have to take care of Miami city.  The Rock makes a cameo as a high ranking special agent who was out of the country at the time of the terrorist attack but he ends up blowing himself up when he tries to show the team how to handle a grenade (it’s a really hilarious scene).

The team goes and makes themselves at home at the Miami Police Station and find that everything there is a lot better than the stuff they have in Reno, including the squad cars, Miami police ride in 2006 Mustangs instead of old Crown Victoria’s.  The team receives some emergency calls that they respond to.  One call had to do with an alligator in a swimming pool and Jones and Dep. James Garcia (Carlos Alazraqui) responded to it and one of the neighbors thinks he can take it on so he goes into the pool and gets eaten.  Another call has to do with a beached whale (that’s now dead) and the entire team has to try to get if off the beach.  They end up blowing it up and chunks of the whale fly everywhere and on top of everyone on the beach, it’s pretty gross.  Trudy and Raineesha get a call about someone making some illegal offers on the street.  The girls get out there (Raineesha in a thong bathing suit and Trudy in bathing suit but still with her granny panties underneath) and they see that it’s no one other than Terry.  As it turns out Terry’s in Miami shooting a music video for his new music album (he’s still on his roller skates and itty bitty shorts).  They don’t believe him and ask him to get off the streets. 

As usual the team has a ton of fun with their antics around the city and in the end they find out that the person who put all the police officers at the convention at deadly risk was the little guy who is now acting Mayor.  His plan was to gang up with a drug lord, who pretends to be Puerto Rican but is really some guy from like Connecticut or something, and take over Miami.  The acting mayor kills the drug lord when he is discovered by the Reno Sheriffs Dept. and runs off with the only cure for the police officers at the convention.  The team chases him down on golf carts and just as they’re about to get beaten in a show down on a bridge when Jones and Garcia show up in a Marine helicopter (the ones with the missiles on the side) and the acting Mayor gives up.  Lt. Dangle puts him under arrest and in a squad car when Trudy, who is in the Marine helicopter, accidentally fires one of the missiles into the squad car that the acting mayor is in.  Trudy says ‘my bad’ and they cut to the next day where we see all the law enforcement officers getting a shot of the cure.  All of the officers clap and congratulate the Reno Sheriffs Department on their work done well.

Lt. Dangle gets a job offer from one of the Sheriffs Department he’s always wanted to work for and accepts.  He tells the team that he’s enjoyed working with them but he’s leaving with the other guys.  Back at the roach motel Garcia is out overlooking the ocean when Clementine comes up to him and asks what’s wrong, he tells her that he fell for some girl while they were there and he got a tattoo of her on his but cheek.  Garcia shows Clementine the tattoo and we see that it is obviously a picture of Clementine.  She shows him hers and they just look at each other and walk away. 

The team is about to board the bus when Terry (the guy that’s always on roller skates and getting caught for prostitution in Reno) tells them that he’s got a jet and his limo is about to pick him up and if they want a ride.  No one believes him but then all of a sudden a limo drives up to pick up Terry.  In aw they all ride with Terry in the limo to the jet and apologize for not believing him. 

Back in Reno in the briefing room it’s now Garcia who is briefing the team and not Lt. Dangle.  The door opens and we see Dangle putting on his belt walking up to take the briefing sheets from Garcia.  The team sits in silence and Dangle looks at them and says that when he got up there he just didn’t like...Junior cuts him off by saying “they found out you were…” and Dangle says “yeah they have a really strict policy against that.”  Trudy goes up to Dangle, cups his private part and says “I know you came back for me, we’ll talk later.”  Dangle, with a look of confusion says ‘okay’ and goes on with the briefing saying that the Reno Sheriffs Department has been invited to next years National Police Convention in Scotland Yard.  The movie ends with everyone cheering.

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